Well we survived the night without incident. Even the weather savant dude who shares my bed had a pretty uneventful night. At least he did not wake me up with more weather predictions.
And then it rained some more.
And then someone (rhymes with “key”) got up and found out someone else (rhymes with ‘heather bouffant rude’) had left the bathroom window open. I found out because ice cold water up to the ankles when you are limping through to find the toilet is quite an eye opener. So someone (the “key” rhyme-ee) had to mop up in the dark and swear under her breath. Good thing I have incredibly well developed lungs.
(perhaps you and the rest of the office people gathered around to read this important news should stop a moment and hug one another. Reflect on your loved ones and how grateful you are that you have an ordinary spouse and not a savant like mine … life is precious. Yes, of course Bic lighters are completely appropriate at moments like this.)
I lay awake worrying that I had written a flippant post about filling the shoes of One Direction, should they be cut off from civilization for awhile with the storm, and that if something terrible actually happened to them I would become an instant, overnight internet virus. I have always dreamed of going viral … I am trying to say that so I sound hip and aware but realize the fact I just typed “hip and aware” is probably a dead giveaway that I am a bold face liar. Everyone is supposed to be engaged in a constant daily effort to do something, caught on film, that could be uploaded to You Tube and suddenly they would be pronounced awesome. No-one bothers with “I want my son or daughter to be a doctor” anymore. We want viral kids.
I could see A Current Affair surrounding the house wanting to know how I could be so flip and cruel in the face of such a disaster and pre-pubescent girls everywhere would want to kill me. I couldn’t sleep.
I awoke this morning to the pics you see here. Actually that is also a lie. I awoke to complete darkness because for some reason, since my retirement, and my long anticipated dream of being able to sleep in as long as I want, I wake up at 4:30 AM every morning, wanting to paint walls, bake bread, and write a novel. So finally, proof we lose our marbles as we age.
It was too dark to take a picture so I had to wait for the dawn.
Then I did what any committed reported does. I put myself in the direct line of danger. I went out in the rain, armed with an umbrella and the highest shoes I could find to keep my feet from ever touching the ground. I could not risk my feet coming into contact with any of the freaking worms that are everywhere. I certainly hope, come Armageddon that the cockroaches take them out first.
I got the pictures.
The neighbours were pointing out their windows at the crazy lady with the umbrella and the camera out in the middle of the cyclone, standing on the edge of the pool snapping pictures. I saw the shake their heads and mouth “Canadian” to one another. I turned and waved … until I remembered I forgot to get dressed and during the night, when the whole flooded bathroom thing happened, my nightie got soaked and I had to take it off. Hard to juggle protective hands, umbrella, camera, running feet.
Sometimes natural disasters like these provide unexpected moments that allow us to bond with complete
strangers neighbours strangers.
I tried to race back to the door as fast as I could . . . and then my shoe fell apart and my barefoot touched concrete and I had to dance and hop my way through the worms screaming. I still have no idea how I made it into the house alive.
This whole worm thing is not funny anymore.
And as for the cyclone, well the one bridge is under, we are waiting to see what else happens.
Meanwhile in other news, the people of Gympie are waking up to the flooding around town, and sipping milk while they decide what to do next.
(that is not a bad word here in Australia, will the Canadian people just home from church please sit down and remain calm)
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